Friday, June 19, 2009

The Weak Ender: Tony Romo Fat?

Cowboys QB Tony Romo was ripped by offensive coordinator Jason Garret because of his conditioning. But it was just the outfit that he was wearing and those grandma jeans.

Don't worry, Romo will be in great shape once the season starts. How can he not because his girlfriend is in such killer shape.

Hey, it's not to say that Romo is out of shape, but the Cowboys are going to be introducing a third jersey -- a Cowboys jersey in Hawaiian print.

THE NFL made a surprising move the other day when Mr. Goodell suspended Browns WR Donte Stallworth. Can you believe that ... the NFL suspending a player for killing another person? That never happens. Normally you have to gamble or take diet pills for the NFL to get pissed.

Murder, however, is now against the league bylaws. That's good to know.

The league is suspending Stallworth who will serve a one-month jail sentence for taking another man's life.

Here's the thing, though. Stallworth got his sentenced reduced as part of a plea agreement with the victim's family. Stallworth will pay out tons of money, but only serve 30 days in jail. Can't Plaxico Burress do the same thing? And since he was the victim, can't he agree to a plea deal with the victim (himself) for a reduced sentence?

Why hasn't his lawyer thought of this already? Burress should be paying THN for this prime real estate advice.

BENGALS WR Chad Ochocinco is one, dumb SOB, but he is highly amusing. Ochocinco has been threatening to fight everybody from Mike Golic (can't blame him) to Solomon Wilcots. He's guaranteeing the playoffs (and he's right, the Bengals will be going to the playoffs) and now he's going to move in with QB Carson Palmer.

If Michael Strahan can get his own sit-com, then this perfect-strangers mix of 85 and Palmer should be highly entertaining.

HARD TO imagine news I'm more excited about then the proposed super baby of Tom Brady and Gisele. Still think Tommy Boy is making a huge mistake by having Gisele getting all stretched out while Bridget Moynahan is willing to take the brunt of the baby-making process. Think, man.

Here's the question, though. Which super Brady baby will end up being the better quarterback? This second kid probably ends up being taller.

EVERYBODY IS blaming A-Rod being off the juice for his recent (lack of) performance. And how do you like that Yankees, losing two of three at home to the Senators (I don't care). But the problem isn't A-Rod quitting the drugs. It's Yoko Hudson. But instead of ruining one of the greatest American rock bands of its generation, Hudson is ruining the Yankees. So at least she's giving back.

ANYBODY BUMMED that Sammy Sosa turned out to be a phony? He full us all. Well, at least he fooled me. Certainly some bitter White Sox fan will claim -- "he never got me." Fine. But Sammy seemed too good to be true. Turns out he was.

AND FINALLY, the Freeway Series returns to Anaheim Stadium. And let's hope that Dodger Fan got out enough angst during the Lakers parade to not even bother with coming to Anaheim.

Alyssa Milano is more than welcome to attend, though.

This is easily the worst series of the dreaded three Yankees-Red Sox-Dodgers. The East Coast a-holes are bad enough, but a Dodger Fan could end up taking your life.

Yes, even Milano if the wife ever catches me making eyes with her.

The Angels have proven that they can win the NL West, sweeping the Padres and Giants. This will truly be a test to see if the team is ready to play with the big boys. A barometer series if you will. The Dodgers maybe be a little inflated because they get a full season filling up on these creme puffs. So this is just as big of a series for them, too.

Should be fun. But hopefully those guys caught on tape thrashing a bus and newspaper boxes are still in jail and won't be able to make it to the game.

As a public service announcement, get ready to drop the blogspot. Start coming to the site through andreikirilenkotattoo.com from now on. In a matter of weeks, THN will be off the blogspot and will have its own unique name. Anybody excited? Didn't think so.

No comments:

Post a Comment