What's 'What's Alan Watching?'

Like the description says, I get paid to watch TV, which is quite possibly the sweetest gig known to Western civilization. As a sports fan, I would've thought that being a sportswriter might equal it, but my experience is that the job ruins your love of the game. I've been watching TV professionally for almost a decade, and what's my favorite leisure activity? Watching more TV. (Sad but true.)

I have a daily column in The Star-Ledger, New Jersey's biggest newspaper and the one I grew up reading. In the column I split with my friend and fellow critic Matt Zoller Seitz, I have an outlet of about 800-1000 words a day to write whatever I want about TV: reviews, news, rants, jokes, whatever.

So why do I need a blog to write more about TV? Because sometimes, 800-1000 words a day just ain't enough. Because before I was a professional TV critic, I was writing web reviews of "NYPD Blue," and I miss the immediacy of that. Because my editors frown on me writing about the same shows over and over again, and if I want to weigh in on every single episode of "Arrested Development" (two words: Bob Loblaw), then I'm going to find a way to do it.

I'm still figuring out exactly what I'm going to do with this space, but here are things you'll definitely find:

• Direct links to every column I write for the Ledger, since I know our website's difficult to navigate. (And on the days when my column doesn't get posted, I may temporarily put it up here.)
• Links to other critics' columns that I enjoy.
• Next-day impressions of whatever I watched on TV the night before.
• Short takes on any review screeners I've watched for work, some of which I'm sure will read like rough drafts of the eventual reviews.
• Occasional comments on the books I'm reading or movies I've seen (TV's my vocation, but I'm an all-around pop culture fiend).
• Personal life anecdotes if they're relevant (i.e., I won't discuss my daughter's eating habits, but I might talk about her reaction to "Sesame Street").
  

I had planned on including a Crash Davis-style manifesto on Things I Believe for this first post, but I've already put off getting this puppy on-line for three days now, and since I'm skipping ABC's Sunday night shows to watch baseball, I can do that on Monday. (Along with comments on "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and "Extras," which I got to see a few weeks back.)

Oh, and if anyone's actually reading this and can identify the origin of the blog's name without a Google search (you're on the honors system), I'll mail you one of the many network promotional tchotchkes cluttering my desk (Donald Trump bobblehead doll, perhaps?).

(NOTE: Not that anyone has responded yet, but a cursory glance at the Superfund site that is my desk makes me believe I tossed the Trump bobblehead a while back. Can I interest anyone in a "Lucky" deck of playing cards? An "American Dad" plastic cup?)

Giambi Humble to Receive Award

Yankees slugger Jason Giambi took the opportunity to thank his personal physician and Hollywood as he was named the AL comeback player of the year on Thursday. Giambi, who battled tumors, parasites, and roid rages in 2004, was hitting around the Mendoza line early in the 2005 campaign. Giambi, whose weigh fell some where around his lousy batting average, turned in a Popeye-like performance over the last two-thirds of the season, as he belted home runs like he played for the American Dreams on the old Baseball Stars video game?

What was the reason for the seemingly overnight turn-around? Giambi said it was a trip to his doctor and an inspiration from one of his favorite movies of all-time, the James Caan vehicle, The Program. Giambi said that he turned away the doctor Barry Bonds prescribed and instead took the advice of Brady Anderson to get on the straight-and-narrow.

"You look at a guy like Brady Anderson and he is somebody who did things the right way," Giambi said. "You never heard his name mentioned in connection with steroids. You never heard of him coming out and belting 50 home runs in a season out of the blue. That dude was all natural."

Giambi also noted that he was inspired by the Steve Lattimer character in the movie portrayed by Andrew Bryniarski. Giambi said that he really could identify with the struggles of Lattimer and knew what it was like to be in a similar situation.

"The dude did not take no for an answer," Giambi said. "In the end, he knows what he has to do to make himself the best, and he does it with no regard to his long-term health. That is certainly the right way to do things."

Tonight, A Very Special "O.C."

It is fitting, in a season that swirled around the controversial name change to Los Angeles, the biggest hit of the season (so far) was delivered by a man they call O.C.

Orlando Cabrera even defiantly flipped his bat towards the Yankees dugout after his two-out, two-run single blew open Game 2 of the ALDS. Dude, you are an Angel now. Both literally and figuratively. Some questioned the removal of the popular David Eckstein for Cabrera, but that has now been answered with his heroics. Smacking down the Yankees has become a right of passage in Anaheim. The clubhouse is filled with guys who, at one time or another, have put the Yankees in their place. The Angels pass around the Yankees like they are Fawn Leibowtiz at a Delta House party.

It is what we do in Anaheim, Los Angeles, or even the O.C.

The teams are now tied now as the series shifts to the Angels home park�Yankee Stadium. That is right. No team has made itself more at home at Yankee Stadium than the Angels. This is the point where a respectable journalist would back up this claim with numbers, but trust us. The Yankees did want to go back to New York needing to win two games.

Fans quiet: The typically boisterous regular-season Yankees crowd is thinned out during the playoffs, making them as relevant as your typical Devil Rays boosters. Those in attendance on Wednesday night looked disheveled following the game. Yankees fans are notoriously myopic and will run their mouths even after their team has lost three of four games (like they did earlier this year).

That was gone on Wednesday. Instead of talking about the split in Anaheim, the few remaining fans had that "Here we go again" look on their faces. They know what is coming next. The Yankees and their fans have the same look in their eye that Roddy Pipper, Big John Stud, and Ric Flair all do when Hulk Hogan is "Hulking Up" for a major comeback. There comes a point where no matter how many slaps you throw, the Hulk (in this case the Angels) are going to come back and win.

Whatca going to do?

No defense for they Yankees: Prima Donna Alex Rodriguez and the typically sure-handed Derek Jeter made fans long for the Alfonso Soriano days with their respective lack of defense on Wednesday. A-Rod booted a routine ground ball in the sixth inning that allowed the Angels to tie the game. At least A-Rod has backed up his stellar defense as he has gone 2-for-22 in his last six playoff games. At least nobody remembers Dave Winfield now.

Smack from the manager: Angels skipper Mike Scioscia even took a shot at A-Rod's defense. "I think the lights got to Alex on that play." Yeah, A-Rod is so unfamiliar with playing in Angels Stadium after all of those years with Seattle and Texas.

The Angels manager also mentioned that his dog must have eaten Jason Giambi's drug test.

They play baseball the "right way:" A Yankees fans standing behind terrace section 221 was trying to tell anybody who would listen (which means nobody) that you have to respect the Yankees for playing baseball the right way. Well except for that A-Rod play in last year�s playoffs were he tried to knock the ball out of a first baseman�s glove. Or the whole lack of defense thing. Or that Giambi using steroids deal.

The Yankees play baseball the right way much in the same vein as the "Really Rottens" played the right way during the Laugh A-Lympics on Saturday mornings during the 1970s.

Speaking of Giambi: The slugger has steroid-induced boils on his neck that look like they could hit .330. Plus the guy officially has "the film." You know, that greasy look that makes the guy look like scumbag even moments after he walks out of the shower. How does a guy sweat so much as a designated hitter? He sweats more than Mo Vaughn walking up to a buffet line.

Steroid lottery: Is there a special code among baseball players were all steroid abusers wear number 25? Think about it, Mark McGuire, Barry Bonds, Rafael Palmeiro, and Giambi all shared the number.

Can you dig it? Angels pitcher John Lackey threw more bounce passes on Wednesday night than Kobe Bryant did last season. At least Lackey has not tried to get Vladamir Guerrero traded to the Marlins. Vlade did refer to himself as "The Big Aristotle" after the game.

Excuse me: Ever notice that Jeter gets that "Do you know who I am?" look on his face after he is called out on strikes? The nerve of some umpires.

The fans behind Section 221 are going to hell for this: A group of fans (alright us) started a USA! USA! chant after Yankees starter Chien-Ming Wang was knocked out by Columbia-born Cabrera's base hit. That seems harsh, but Wang opened the game by singing the Russian national anthem before he declared that, "Taiwan No. 1, China No. 1" and then spat when he mentioned the USA.

Wang was making his first playoff start in 2005 after appearing in the Little League World Series last year.