Rise of the little people

Spoilers for "Doctor Who" and "Battlestar Galactica" coming up just as soon as I munch on some algae bars...

I don't usually review Sci-Fi's two Friday shows together (and have been painfully remiss in commenting on "Who" altogether of late, even as I've been unable to stop saying "Ood" at random moments throughout my day), but an accident of scheduling made for a thematic double feature: episodes of both shows in which the stars were reduced to supporting characters at best.

"Doctor Who" was more blatant in this, keeping The Doctor and Rose off-screen for all but a handful of minutes, and using the members of LINDA as an odd (not Ood), affectionate tribute to the show's own fans. Ross Ruediger (whose exhaustive analysis over on Matt's site leave me feeling better about not writing about the show weekly), suggests in his latest that LINDA is a fan message board come to life, and that Victor Kennedy is a troll:

The guy who bitches and attempts to moderate those veering away from a group's charter issue(s). He shouts "Off Topic!" at the expression of individuality, controlling cyber forums by preying on feelings of insecurity. He's the sort of dude who takes all the fun out of it by trying to absorb everyone into his way of doing things.

I've marveled in the past over this show's ability to service its guest characters in minimal amounts of time so that I care when, say, a Mrs. Moore gets zapped. Obviously, Russell T. Davies had more room than usual to work this particular brand of magic, and Marc Warren and Shirley Henderson made for a nice geek-love couple. (On the other hand, I get very uncomfortable imagining the realities of their relationship going forward, and not just the sex stuff. What happens if Elton meets a girl who isn't two-thirds concrete slab? What does Ursula do to fill her days when Elton's not around? Is she immortal? What if she gets sick of ELO?)

But the character done the biggest favor, I thought, was Jackie Tyler. Though she only had a few scenes, this was her version of "The Zeppo," the first time we've seen The Doctor's universe entirely from her viewpoint. Jackie's always been a bit of a cartoon, in both this incarnation and her Age of Steel counterpart, and this really humanized her. Like Mickey before her, she now seems too real to be just stranded in present-day London while The Doctor and Rose have their adventures. Be nice to see her go for a ride in the TARDIS, even if just the once.

The regulars had slightly more to do over on "Galactica," as Moore and company (including "Buffy" vet and celebrity blogger Jane Espenson handling freelance script duties) did one of their occasional forays into the harsh realities of life in the rag-tag fleet. The last time they tried to hit this note, we got the universally-panned "Black Market," but the parts of "The Passage" devoted to the food shortage itself worked much better. If nothing else, the actors can sell the effects of famine much more easily than they can explain why black marketeering is an essential economic force in a military/civilian/pro-am/democratic space fleet. Two moments in particular stood out: Apollo trying to boost his pilots' failing morale after they lost another ship, and Adama and Tigh laughing just a little too hard at Saul's "paper shortage" joke.

This was also a sterling episode for the visual effects department. I think Espenson (and Moore, and whoever else had a hand in the rewrite process) didn't do the best job conveying the reasons for the food shortage or for the method of traveling through the cluster, but the VFX damn sure conveyed what a difficult task this was. (Even Moore, in the podcast, has to admit that the lack of tinted cockpit windows and/or sun visors on the pilots' helmets is a contrivance so we can see the actors' faces during flight scenes.)

Where I think "The Passage" stumbled -- and even here, not nearly as far as "Black Market" did with Apollo's single mama hooker friend -- it was with the expanded spotlight on Kat. I'm usually all for the kind of episodes that spotlight the Reg Barclays and Greg Medavoys of the world. I just didn't love the execution, both Luciana Carro's performance and the amount of backstory dumped on us in the space of an hour. (As others have pointed out before me, there was also a "Lost" quality to how much we were asked to care for a previously minor/unlikable character right before she got killed off.) But Edward James Olmos saved the whole affair with the sickbay scene. I knew the whole story felt contrived, but when Adama sat down at Kat's bedside and started to talk, I forgot all about that and started to wonder when my TV room got so dusty.

The Cylon scenes continue to leave me a bit cold, and turns out I'm not the only one. I'm only 30 or so minutes into the epic, three-hour drunken roundtable podcast that got posted late last week, but Jamie Bamber very bluntly (but respectfully) tells Moore that he wishes the Cylons were more mysterious, and Moore barely hesitates before admitting that Bamber's probably right. This season (both next week's episode and the ones that will begin airing in January) obviously hinges a lot on the Cylon mythology, and if Moore, who's a lot further along in seeing episodes than we are, doesn't feel like it's working as well as he had hoped, I'm afraid of where we're going from here.

What did everybody else think? In particular, I'm still sorting through my feelings about Kara's role in Kat's death, and about her behavior in general since they left New Caprica. Complicated is good, but I start to worry that, like Veronica Mars, her writers don't realize how she's starting to come across.

The Post Mortem

The Chargers are your division champions, LT sets the single-season touchdown mark, but first (expletive) the Panthers. Has there ever been a more befuddling team than the Carolina Panthers? This team has seemed cursed ever since it lost the Super Bowl to the Patriots. Each season after that, the Panthers are tabbed to be the NFC representative in the Super Bowl and ever year it�s a bigger letdown than an Iron Maiden concert.

The Panthers are now just one big slump buster for the rest of the NFC. They are like an overweight chick sitting at the end of the bar in a halter-top, fishnet stockings and wearing too much makeup. (No, not that girl in the picture, her friend.) Philadelphia and New York have gotten back into the playoff race by getting a piece of that action. Thanks a lot Carolina. Now Eli Messiah is walking around with that goofy grin, again.

CHARGERS WIN THE WEST

The Chargers also control their own destiny for home field advantage, too. But brace yourself for the upcoming weeks. You are going to hear a lot about Marty Schottenheimer's failures in the playoffs. It is inevitable. And it�s fair, too. Everybody from Peyton Manning to Dan Marino are scrutinized for their playoff failures. So Marty is no different. But this feels much different from your typical Marty Schottenheimer-led team. Trick plays and running up the score is what Martyball is all about.

Seriously, didn't that game seem close for like a minute? Like a lot closer than that Michigan v. Ohio State game. But you couldn�t make it through one beer before the Chargers went from a somewhat close game to a four-touchdown advantage.

This is going to be Marty�' best chance to rid himself of those playoff ghosts. He has never had a running back like LaDainian Tomlinson and Philip Rivers is much better than a lot of people (us included) could have anticipated.

• Great job, LT, in breaking that record. But you couldn�t wait another week so THN could have been there live to capture it?

• Is there a lonelier place right now than the Dallas Cowboys bandwagon? What a fraud. A Super Bowl contender a week ago, now its grasp on the NFC East title is in jeopardy. Unbelievable. It is also time to start giving Drew Brees some credit. Letting Brees walk away was the right thing to do for San Diego. You never got the feeling that Brees was the guy who was going to take your team to the title. That perception is starting to change. Of course, whispers about a Chargers/Saints Super Bowl will heat up. Don't fall for it. Not with the way NFC teams jockey for position. You would be better served just to pull a name out of a hat. Oh wait, this one says �CAROLINA,� never mind.

• Bummer for all of you that had a Lance Alworth Cowboys jersey. You won't get much use out of it now.

• Of the three quarterbacks the Chargers have had over the past couple of years, who would you rather have: Rivers, Brees or Messiah? Messiah would definitely be the last one on the list.

• Longtime producer Bob Daly passed away recently, and Joe Buck was waxing poetically while the camera was focused on some clouds. But what if the guy went to hell? Like, if he was a bad dude, would they have shown a BBQ pit or something?

• How will you remember the Patriots dynasty? Because it is done. Buck could have eulogized that while he was at it. It serves New England right. Their dynasty was similar to the 1990s Cowboys, where they just felt that if they kept Tom Brady there, it would be enough. But role players are important, too. As New England is finding out.
  
  Pats fans pointed out that, unlike the Cowboys, the Patriots didn�t fire their coach. That�s true, but it seems like Bill Belichick is doing a mighty fine Barry Switzer impersonation. If Belichick is the genius that everybody believes he is, he will hopefully see the value in keeping some of these role players and realize that Brady needs to be surrounded by talent.

AND FINALLY
Why can't FOX switch from a blowout to a competitive game? (Yes, get a dish.) The suspicion is that Joe Buck would probably throw the biggest female-dog fit if they ever switched out of one of his games. It is likely in his contract or something. And if you don�t want to switch, that�s cool. But don�t taunt the audience.

"Wow, the Eagles and Redskins are having the game of the century right now, but we won�t switch to that because I�m Joe EXPLETIVE Buck.�

Go to hell, Joe Buck.

How CBS missed its big chance

Today's column, expanding on my love of "How I Met Your Mother" and my feeling that CBS should have given it, and not "Criminal Minds," the post-Super Bowl slot:

A week ago, CBS announced that an episode of "Criminal Minds" would get the primo post-Super Bowl time period. And why not? "Criminal Minds," in spite of reviews that compare it (sometimes unfavorably) to a snuff film, has been the season's biggest growth story, edging perilously close to timeslot rival "Lost" in the 18-49 demographic and occasionally passing it in total viewers. It's become such a force that ABC will actually move "Lost" back an hour to 10 o'clock Wednesdays when it returns in February.

Here's why not: Because "How I Met Your Mother" -- the best traditional sitcom left on TV, and the first true heir to "Friends" -- is also on the CBS schedule, just waiting for this kind of showcase.

What's the upside on "Criminal Minds," especially when "American Idol" will be moving into the time period just as "Lost" is moving out? True, nobody expected it to do as well as it already has this year. And there's a chance it could follow the pattern of last year's post-pigskin show, "Grey's Anatomy," which was already rising up the charts before the game and is now the most popular show on television.

But at the end of the day, as people in the TV business like to say, how much higher can "Criminal Minds" go on a network that's in the double figures on crime dramas? If you want to watch a procedural police show, chances are you're more than familiar with CBS' line-up, even if you haven't checked them all out. Maybe the Super Bowl exposure nudges this show ahead a little, but a "Grey's"-like explosion? Nah.

"How I Met Your Mother," on the other hand, is the exact kind of show that can take advantage of the borrowed Super Bowl audience. The story of five New York friends in their late 20s looking for love and having silly adventures, it's not remotely what people expect to find on CBS. If it were airing on NBC Thursdays at 8:30 four or five years ago, it would be a sensation; on CBS in 2006, it's a solidly-performing afterthought.

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