The Mid-Weak Ender: Enough with the Crying

And we are not talking about people complaining about their brackets this early, either.

Welcome to the Mid-Weak Ender, since productivity will end around, well, it is probably already ended because of St. Patrick's Day. This holiday prior to March Madness officially surpasses Thanksgiving week as the most worthless work week imaginable. Why you are even expected to be at work is a mystery.

Life is too short to be bogged down during times like these. Especially in this economy. We are in this depression because we are too constrained by day-to-day living. Get out and celebrate. If you think about how fleeting life is, do you really want to miss out on the good times. Be it spending time with your family, or with friends. Or drinking in a dimly lit bar, watching a bunch of college kids play a sport while drinking green beer.

Priorities people.

Hopefully you are all reading this hungover because you bailed at noon on Wednesday. So for you, I will STOP SHOUTING. If you are still at work, get the hell out of there. No reason to be there at all.

Now, one of the dear friends of The Hater Nation, WCT, lamented for years that Erin Andrews was never a Weak Ender Girl. And now he is probably sick of her being a WEG, and to be honest, I am too.

For somebody who wants her privacy and fears for her life, she certainly does a lot of television interviews. Even the cast of Jersey Shore feels that Andrews needs to chill the f out when it comes to television appearances.

Now, I will consider that Andrews was filmed unknowingly (but something does not add up). But we can all agree that she has certainly used this 'misfortune' to her own benefit. This verdict was nicely timed to coincide with her appearance for Dancing with the Stars.

When she was sitting there blubbering about, "Those pictures are still on the Internets, my life is never the same. Poor me. ... Oh, and be sure to vote for me on Dancing with the Stars," yeah, I was over it.

And a couple of things here. Can you still find her videos on the internets? Because they are damn hard to find. She is likely most upset that she was filmed and did not make any money off it (at least not yet. Playboy is coming, you watch).

But this is where we have come as a society. Pamela Anderson's fame went up after her sex tape. Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton and Brittany Spears made flashing their beavers while coming out of cars fashionable. So I give Andrews credit for the peep videos. An alleged horrific incident has turned into a Dancing with the Stars win (it is going to happen, as Gavin Newsome would say, whether you like it or not) and an acting career.

Seriously, though, can those videos still be found? If only Sun Devil were still alive.

IS ANYBODY surprised that the Giants are going to be hosting the first game in the new Meadowlands Stadium? Does anybody even think that there was actually a coin-flip at all? Jets owner Woody Johnson does not believe so, and to be honest, I do not, either.

The whole thing is as fishy as that Andrews' video, and not as titillating.

The Jets are second-class citizens, and the Mara family is always going to get the benefit of the doubt. In fact, I wish there would have been a way to wager on that coin flip, because there was no way that was going to end up in the Jets favor.

There was a report that Johnson's tirade could cost the Jets a Super Bowl bid. Uh, does this stadium have a retractable roof that I did not hear about? Because there is no way a Super Bowl should be considered in New York. Talk about your arrogance. Why would New York be considered for an outdoor Super Bowl and not New England or Washington or even Baltimore?

Seriously though, why is there not a roof over this thing? And why not Yankee Stadium and the new ballpark where the Mets play? There is no reason to have outdoor stadiums when we have the technology to put in retractable roofs. That would be like designing a new automobile and leaving out the seat belts. Good lord this is stupid.

The 2009 ALCS was marred because of the crappy weather in New York. And Chone Figgins. So I guess that explains why the Mets do not need a roof. But still. Should we start a Facebook page saying no New York Super Bowl?

NOW SOME tournament thoughts ... Actually, I've got nothing. Not following college basketball this year has made it tough for me, meaning my bracket will do better than ever. I am, like I mentioned earlier, excited for for the West Coast mid-majors. But one of them is BYU, which has lost seven consecutive opening round games. Maybe this is the year that BYU turns it around, but Billy Donovan vs. Dave Rose seems like a mis-match.

Still sticking with Kansas. That team looks awesome. But I am really getting scared that Duke could walk into the finals. Do not let that happen, people.

Of course, the best part of March Madness is betting the dogs. No, not the underdogs, but actual dog racing. But as Doc Ross points out, the true joy comes from booing the other dogs. Take that PETA!

AND FINALLY ...

Seriously, you have not left yet? Go home people.

We will have updates this week though, so check back.

The Mid-Weak Ender

Maria Sharapova is in the news this week because � well, she isn�t reallly. She�s got a new commercial and a new pictorial for GQ. The truth is, there isn�t a very flimsy reason to show this picture. But since we are all anxious to get started on our holiday weekends (though, I will be working on Thursday), let�s dispense with the formalities.

So here�s Maria Sharapova. Vincent Clarke, Bon Harris, Tom Cruise and Kordell Stewart can all talk about how much they would like to knock the bottom out of that. Let�s just start rolling with the Thanksgiving football fun.

BTW, this picture is everywhere, but can�t remember where this photo came from, but it�s a good guess that it�s either Sports By Brooks or With Lethur.

Shall we?

A lot of you have complained that you don�t want the Lions on the Thanksgiving telecast anymore. Are you people mad? Have the Lions been bad in recent years? Certainly. But they have given us a lot of good times with Barry Sanders, Billy Sims and Eric Hipple. (Well, maybe scratch that last one.)

But have the Lions on for Thanksgiving is tradition. A once-a-year tradition. The Lions, people, are family. And that is was Thanksgiving is all about. Having all of the family that you don�t want to see crammed into one day, before we move on and ignore them for another 364 days.

So lay off the Lions people, and let them into your homes.

However, if the Lions are that distant relative that we rarely see, the Cowboys are that annoying relative that we always see. They are the overbearing family member that always stops by unannounced and ruins your life. And really, they shouldn�t be ruining Thanksgiving, too. If there is one team/family member that we can do without on Thanksgiving, it�s the Cowboys.

There are going to be some new characters coming to Thanksgiving this year, here is a rundown of who you can expect to see.

Remember returning home for Thanksgiving during your first year away at college? You meet up with all of your buddies from high school at the local bowling alley and there is an absolute stunner reveling with you. When you ask your friends, �Who is that girl?� they tell you that it�s the plain Jane who sat behind you in English. Now she�s hot. Well, that�s the Tennessee Titans this year. Maybe we should have noticed how hot she was going to be, but we were all idiots in high school. (Except for Hetland, he ruled.)

Conversely, there is always that chick you thought was hot in high school, but now she�s fallen on some hard times. In fact, you are now kind of ashamed that you had a crush on her in the first place. That�s the Seattle Seahawks. (And there's a rumor that you made out with her at a party. Nice going.)

And how about the flake that always promises to stop by and never does? The friend who gets you hopes up, promises to bring dessert but only lets you down? Well, don�t fret this year, you friend � the Arizona Cardinals � are going to make it to the party this year.

Of course, and I�m Scots/Irish so this hits home, there�s always that one relative who drinks a little bit too much, gets obnoxious and ends up getting into a fight on the front laugh. That�s your Uncle Philadelphia Eagles. Three beers in, and he'll be challenging you to punch him in the neck.

So enjoy Thanksgiving.

AND FINALLY
Some of you remain unconvinced that the Lions need to be on television during Thanksgiving. Well, there�s always a compromise � put them on NFL Network and nobody will ever see them.

Mid-Weak Ender

Somebody cheerfully pointed out that this week has two Fridays. After a proper flogging, they came around to recognize that this week has two Mondays as well. The point being that there should be an Amendment to the Constitution that anytime a national holiday falls on a Wednesday, that holiday officially constitutes the entire week. That goes on the amendment list right next to Super Bowl Monday holiday, a $0.99 cap on fountain drinks and a rule that nobody can drive the 22 prior to game day unless you are going to the Angels game.

• Nicole Vaidisova (pictured) ousted the manish Amelie Mauresmo, meaning that a hot-off between her and Maria Sharapova is a possibility for the finals. Shut up, let us dream.

• Titan Tim passed along this story of PacMan Jones installing a strip club in his house. Which is smart because if you do it at home, nobody finds out about it. Just ask Mike Vick. The real question here is who will sign up to be the head of security? In related news, the contractor also is installing a shooting range in Tank Johnson�s house. (Yes, this story has to be bogus.)

AND FINALLY
Four out of five preseason publications are picking the Patriots to win the Super Bowl, causing Tom Brady to go into a fit of rage for being disrespected by Lindy�s. Obviously many of these publications were put together prior to the Chargers replacing Marty Schottenheimer with Norv Turner. There is no way all of these publications would pick the Chargers to win the AFC West with Turner as coach.