Thursday, October 2, 2008

The Reverend Preaches

Ladies and gentlemen, I'll be brief. But let me say, if cancer can't beat John Lester, what chance did the Angels have? So today, we will turn this over to a couple of fans, The Reverend and The Principal who will be laying the smack down.

The Reverend:
Dear Fellow Fan�s,

Do not go quiet into the night. Rage, rage on and wear your colors proudly. For these are the times that truly test one�s soul. My only regret is I have but one season to root for. For if the Angels are eliminated by the savage Huns from the east our season�s demise is but a small price to pay. It is a far, far better thing than I�ve ever done before. We will fight them on the beaches, from the shores of San Clemente , to the breakers at Sunset Beach . We will fight them on the freeways, at every gore point we hold dear. We will fight them at The Block, The District and any other The�s that we cherish so dearly. They will have to pry my Halo pennant from my dead cold hands. So stand up and be counted. Look them in their watery eyes and say no Chowder, put it down and back away slowly. For this playoff series is not over and certainly does not belong to your pasty, Goodwill Hunting white ass. It�s time to show the cut of our jib. I�m not going to stand by and take it like Ned Beatty in some backwoods southern hell hole. No means no and enough is enough! We got four games left and there is no reason to back down to those Kennedy electing, Barney Frank supporting, Leonardo DeCaprio idolizing sodomites. For I am the Angel of Death and you will walk through the valley of the dead Southey and you will feel my wrath!! Its vengeance time in Anaheim . You tell them you shook down the thunder and now you got it. I see a Red Sox I kill it! You tell them Hells coming and I�m coming with it!!!

Awesome. And the follow up:

The Principal:
Goodness! I think there are only a few movie or patriotic speeches he left out. How about �I�m angry as hell, and I�m not going to take it any more!� Or, �One day we may die, but not today! Not this series! Not this year!� (That�s a paraphrase of course, but so were his.) Or, how about: �Hello, our name is �THE ANGELS�. You beat us last year. Prepare to die!� Oh, and another from one of Adam�s favorite movies: �I didn�t hear no fat lady sing!� And finally, who can forget Scarlet O�Hara as she stood on the hill at sunrise, �We will rise from these ashes! We swear by God Almighty, we will not lose again!�

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