The Weak Ender!

Just realize when Brad Penny has another horrible outing, this is who he will be going home to. Realize that and try not to hit yourself in the face with a rake. The boys over at the AOL FanHaus were excited to find out that Eliza is a fan of the site (FanHaus, not THN.) So while she might be with Penny for his good looks, athletic ability and money, all of the bloggers over there can take solace in the fact that Liza loves you guys for your minds.

But she wanted to let you know that she only wanted to be "just friends" for right now.

• Bad news, it looks like Jake Plummer is indeed going to retire. So Plummer will not be going to the Raiders for now. And you know, you kind of have to respect his decision. He has made his money, so why put up with the grief? He will never get a fair shake in any city he goes to play for so it is hard to really blame him. Plummer could have cashed in paychecks as a back-up quarterback, but if he has other things on his mind, good for him. Plus, you have to remember that he was good friends with Pat Tillman and that has to have some impact on his decision to walk away from the game. He�s got a better life right now than Brad Penny.

• Another disappointing turn of events is that Gisele is apparently not pregnant with Tom Brady's baby. What that does for Blonde's rotation, well, that remains to be seen.

• UCLA should still be a No. 1 seed in the tournament. Kansas should be the overall No. 1 even though they play in a horrible conference. UNLV has earned the right to be a No. 3 seed.

• If the Angels have the buyer�s remorse, the Gary Matthews situation should be viewed as good news. Time to put an end to this deal. The Angels would be better served with having Figgins in center field and give the 3B job to Brandon Wood.

• Doesn�t college basketball seem like a better place now that Duke is eliminated from its college tournament? ESPN's Calvin Cowherd tried to reason today that having Duke in the tournament was essential. Why? They don�t move past the first couple rounds in the tournament anyway? Leaving them out would just speed up the process.

AND FINALLY

Hey, at least not all Duke graduates are worthless. John Cornwell has invented a refrigerator that can launch a beer from the kitchen. With an invention like that, who is going to need kids? But until Cornwell can find a way for Eliza to deliver the beer, he might as well keep working.